The Starving Artist

Welcome to another installment of Friday's Fun Family Facts.

Disclaimer: be aware that most of my memories have been tempered by long years of neglect. The people in these posts should be held innocent until proven guilty. I am not posting allegations, but rather, experiences. Continue at your own risk...

So I mentioned Willum - the fund-raiser-candy-stealing-starving-artist-up-from-New-York. I thought, in this installment of Friday's Fun Family Facts I might expound.

You see, Ithaca, New York is one of the largest small towns in the country. Because of the two major Universities in Ithaca, Cornell, and Ithaca College (yes, the one from Road Trip) there was an unprecedented number of famous and powerful people in Ithaca. For instance, Carl Sagan the famous evolutionary proponent and John Peter O'Grady - you know famous and powerful... (I don't remember which country, but while I was in high school the King of a country in Asia graduated from Cornell and there was a huge celebration in his honor.)

Anyway, it was because of this draw that people would find themselves in Ithaca. Willum was, I suppose, one of those people. He was your typical artist. Long blond hair, earthy, smelled like roots, and enjoyed our company long after we enjoyed his.

On one particular trip - which if my memory serves me correctly, there were only two - he happened to be in our home during the annual student council candy selling fund-raiser.

My house was located directly across the street from about 5 different mobile home parks so when fund-raising or trick-or-treating time came around I was usually pretty confident that I would find success. This particular year I had pre-ordered extra boxes of candy to sell under the auspice that I would be able to unload twice as much candy as the poor schlubb that sat next to me in my 4th grade class.

So there I was, young, naive and vulnerable to the conniving of the starving artist up from New York. I don't know how he did it, but the man ended up eating about $10.00 worth of candy. Times were tough!

The unforeseen and damaging result of this experience on my young heart was that for the rest of my candy-selling, school-attending years I had lost my swagger. No longer did I eagerly jump to the front of the line to get the extra box. No, from then on, I was deflated, depressed and defeated. Willum stole so much more then candy that day, he stole my future - at least the part that would have increased my chances of becoming the next Willy Wonka. I'm just saying...

Tune in next week for...something else.